I am learning to add more detail to my writing to make it more interesting for the reader.
Nelson Creek
At Nelson Creek I heard the running water, the cicadas and birds.
I smelt the aroma coming
form some of the bbq's.
I heard the sound of the stones crushing as I walked on them and felt the silky sand
sinking as I stood in the wind as it howled hooo.
The water swished about while the sticks were snapped as I walked along the edge of the
water.
I stopped, I listened, I heard the bridge creaking.
Nelson Creek my favourite
place.
I like the way you have used your senses to describe Nelson Creek. I especially like the line I stopped, I listened, I heard the bridge creaking. I wonder what you were thinking when you smelt the BBQ or heard the stone crushing.
ReplyDeleteNice work here Simeon. I can see that you've been a successful writer because you've definitely added more detail. What are your favourite words you've used? Mine are 'aroma' and 'stones crushing'. I can picture what it might be like from reading your writing. I'm looking forward to seeing more of your great work on your blog Simeon, keep up the great work. Miss J
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